You first have to agree with your debate opponent on the proper standard of "fairness".In this blast from the past, J. Warner addresses a common objection to the loving nature of God. Isn’t it unfair for God to penalize people who are otherwise good, just because they haven’t heard about Jesus?
THEN you'll be able to tell whether eternal torture in hell merely for never having heard about Jesus, is "fair".
Have fun trying to convince an unbeliever that their idea of fairness is wrong because it doesn't agree with "god's" standard.
A good God would not send good people to Hell.In the fundie Christian mind, God standing around and watching a little girl be raped by a man, cannot be considered "bad", and yet when our theological defense mechanisms are not on red alert, we usually DO conclude that where we had ability and opportunity to interfere with such an evil, and we don't, WE are bad.
You will say we are not fit to judge God, but the fact that God sometimes needs humans to drill sense into his head, is clear from the bible:
9 The LORD said to Moses, "I have seen this people, and behold, they are an obstinate people.
10 "Now then let Me alone, that My anger may burn against them and that I may destroy them; and I will make of you a great nation."
11 Then Moses entreated the LORD his God, and said, "O LORD, why does Your anger burn against Your people whom You have brought out from the land of Egypt with great power and with a mighty hand?
12 "Why should the Egyptians speak, saying, 'With evil intent He brought them out to kill them in the mountains and to destroy them from the face of the earth '? Turn from Your burning anger and change Your mind about doing harm to Your people.
13 "Remember Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, Your servants to whom You swore by Yourself, and said to them, 'I will multiply your descendants as the stars of the heavens, and all this land of which I have spoken I will give to your descendants, and they shall inherit it forever.'"
14 So the LORD changed His mind about the harm which He said He would do to His people.
(Exod. 32:9-14 NAU)
You don't know whether God knew all this in advance and just wanted to give Moses an opportunity to talk.
You just say that because it happens to be the type of excuse that would let you continue believing in your absurdly idealistic image of god.
If your view is correct, then God in v. 10 was lying. He didn't really want Moses to leave him alone, but he said "leave me alone" anyway. In the real world, we call that lying.